Bowling. I want to bowl here. I don’t want to continue to have to go to the burbs to bowl. The bowling alleys that exists here are a bit too boutique-like, not old school (with the exception of Moohah). LED lights? Big screen TVs on the lanes? Shitty contemporary auto-tuned music? That doesn’t hit neighborhood style.
We need St. Louis soulful bowling. Neighborhood bowling. There are plenty of opportunities. Ever seen a sport more embraced by both black and white working class people in our current times? St. Louis is a city of black and white working class people. The clientele are us, neighborhood people, St. Louis people.
My dream: California Keokuk Lanes. The building that houses my dreams is shown below and…you guessed it, it’s on California Avenue and Keokuk Street.
See the back? Perfect for five lanes. See the front? Two doors. The one on the corner is for bar patrons and casual bowlers. The one to the right is for serious bowlers who can bypass the first floor bar and get down to business. The door to the right leads down a hallway where there is black door with a padlock on it. It reads “private”. This members only staircase leads to a space for the dedicated, the cool. Sure, overflow too, but during league nights, its for the bowlers.
See the second floor glass blocks and bricked in door? Knock that out, add a lovers/smokers balcony (room for two, max). The warm buzz and glow of the neon sign will serenade your real tobacco reprise (no vape) or the perfect embrace.
Oh, the sign…blade metal and neon sign with perfect font will make it known St. Louis is the place for soulful bowling. The soundtrack is lightly curated but fully accessible. Beer, good bowling alley food and tasteful, classic bowling alley decor.
This is daydream #385, but it may as well be #1 at this point in my life. I can’t shake it.
